SubhanAllah! Right now Iam sitting in Apollo hospital with the reports in my hand.
All praise belongs to Allah swt who tests us through pains, disease and through even ease.
It has been a couple of months since when my doctor raised her serious concern on some well defined painful lesions in my body as probably the sign of cancer.
I underwent many doctors to take the second, third and fourth opinions and they all advised me to go for fnac cancer conformity test. My lesion is quite painful and it really troubles me a lot and it has shown a bit growth within three months of last ultrasound as well.
The near and dear ones were scared only on the suspicion, they informed me that they are praying and making dua for me even in tahajjud.
I didn’t tell even anything in detail to my mom, I just told her that it is a little pain and nothing else as I am smart enough to know this universal truth Alhamdulillah that how mothers react and will feel broken even before the confirmation, so to avoid it, I didn’t inform her the whole issue.
I used to think in between the span of my visit to different doctors that what if it is really a cancer?
Alhamdulillah, though I know it is tough to even envisage that unless one endure it, but I never felt bad, I felt even if it will be, there will be some khair and good in it, my husband kept telling me “see, if by chance it will turn up as a cancer, we will fight it, as I know you don’t give up things easily and you are a brave one who will surely fight it” SubhanAllah, he kept inspiring me throughout.
But somewhere I realised a bit of struggle the cancer and similar disease patients go through, I prayed so much for them all who are suffering like these diseases immensely. May Allah swt make things easy for them and bless them all.
Frankly, I even somewhere have secretly planned how and what I will do if I will get to know that it is cancer and how I will plan the important stuff before I die. The dos and donts, the things I want to do and tell my kids in the form of letter as right now they won’t get it and the whole big list!
What inspireth me were my husband words – “don’t plan when it will be confirmed, plan it NOW thinking that it is the last day as we don’t know, may be we are not alive the next very moment even if we are healthy.”
Alhamdulillah, finally my all tests are done, Alhamdulillah it is not malignant but a benign tumor and it requires a surgery. Alhamdulillah.
Pain. changes. life. And I am updating this personal incident from hospital with fnac and other reports lying on my lap, feeling that alhamdulillah He swt has relieved me, and my family from a hard time and hard test, but the real test begins now, as how I am gonna plan it all, the planned list, the things I wanted to do judiciously with my down health to serve my purpose of life in the best possible way.
Hardships make us remember Him often but the real test starts when He has granted us relief and ease then at that time how we are connecting with Him?
SubhanAllah! The Best thing He swt has taught me was how to be optimistic and fearless.
Seriously, if we all come to know by the professional health expert that we are inflicted with some life threatening disease then perhaps we all will lose the fear, yes the fear which stops us doing productive and saying truth against the tyranny as we somewhere fear for our lives.
We all are foretold by The Creator that we are approaching death with every declining of the time then why fear?
Fear is something which really inhibits us, our true selves, and thus we are remindeth in Holy Quran again and again, “Fear them not, Fear ME only”, “Put your Trust in Him only”, “Say, For us our Lord sufficeth and He is The Best Disposer of all affairs” all this to eradicate FEAR and instil Trust.
Fear should be eradicated as it spreads like cancer in the mind of humans and it invades the healthy tissues making them all unhealthy and sick. Let’s stop this invasion before it is too late.
May Allah swt bless us all with good health and utilise us all well for His sake.